KNOCKING SHIT OFF OF HIGH PLACES – A BOOK WITH A CLIFFHANGER

We’ve all seen it right? The majestic leap up high. The tentative dab of the paw at something on the high surface. The crash if you don’t get to them quick enough. Hopefully it wasn’t breakable. Or your wedding ring. But, really, this wasn’t the cat’s fault. It’s yours. Some things shouldn’t be left near cliffs…

Black Sun by Rebecca Roanhorse

One of the main things I knew when starting this book is that it ends on cliffhanger. And I think, I braced for it so well, that I’m not entirely sure I agree it does? Even though one of the few things I’ve seen people on the internet agree on is that this book ends on a cliffhanger. But, the entire book is a countdown to a thing, the thing that was promised happens, I got what I was sold. It’s the first book in a series so ofc it’s gonna leave stuff open?

HOWLING AT 3AM – A BOOK YOU DIDN’T SLEEP TO FINISH

To you, it is sleep time. To the cat, it is playtime. Or maybe they’re hungry. Or just evil, for tis the witching hour. Whatever the reason, you should be awake. The cat says so. Some books are similarly insistent…

Dread Nation by Justina Ireland

I was not expecting to love a book about zombies, but oh boy did I. The main character has such a gripping voice I couldn’t put this down. It surprised me in so many ways.

HIDING BEFORE A VET VISIT – A BOOK WITH A SELF-DESTRUCTIVE CHARACTER

Some people have a sixth sense for impending calamity. Most cats have a sixth sense for an impending visit to the vet and hide. Who cares if it’s for their own good? We’ve all read someone like that…

The Bone Witch by Rin Chupeco

I admit I had to crowdsource this one since I tend to avoid books with self-destructive characters, and after two days of trying to remember one (from fiction, that wasn’t Voltaire) I gave up and ask the good people at the Fantasy Inn discord for help. And I do admit Tea is a good fit, the books are filled with “oh nooo what are you doing” tension.

THE TURD DANGLING FROM THEIR BEHIND – A SEQUEL THAT WAS A BIT, ER, TURD

Sometimes cats eat hair. And sometimes when they do, it gets stuck post-defecation, with a little bit of said defecation attached to it. So when your darling cat goes by and you get excited, you soon realise there’s something horrible behind them. Just like a bad sequel…

OH IS IT TIME FOR ANOTHER RHYTHM OF WAR RANT?

I already wrote my longest post ever about why I was disappointed in the fourth Stormlight book (here it is, in case you missed it). TL;DR: I thought it was boring, flat, bloated, repetitive, flowed like a piano down stairs and about as enjoyable. By the time it was suppossed to get better I was too angry at it to enjoy anything.

PUKING ON THE CARPET – A BOOK WITH A BETRAYAL

We all know this one. And we all know it’s not really the cat’s fault. But why now? And especially, why there? Why not a nice easy to clean surface? Right or wrong, it feels like a betrayal…

The Unbroken by C.L. Clark

So many kinds of betrayl going on in this book! I know I mostly talk about the sexy arms, but I assure you it has a plot and great characters too!

DRAGGING IN LIVE ANIMALS – A BOOK WITH SHOCKING VIOLENCE

One time I heard a great commotion and looked up to see a pigeon flying up my hallway, pursued by a mighty predator bounding away. I get that you are a mean lean hunting machine, but do you have to bring me the final act to watch? Sometimes it all just seems a little over the top…

Redacted

LOOKING YOU IN THE EYE BEFORE MISBEHAVING – A BOOK WITH A CHARACTER DESPERATE FOR ATTENTION

It’s one thing to be naughty, nay, malevolent. But to look right at me before you do it? Just to make sure your cry for attention will get attention? Why not lie in front of the television ins- oh, you did that too. Cats just really love attention…

Legendborn by Tracy Deonn

Selwynn Kane is everything I usually hate in YA characters, smug asshole who act like he’s above everyone and love a dramatic entrance. But in Legendborn he worked so well! I loved him, or at least loved to be annoyed by him until he grew on me like fungus. And he sure does love the attention.

SHREDDING THINGS- A BOOK WITH A DESTRUCTIVE CHARACTER

Soft furnishings. Wrapping paper. Your jeans. The loo roll. If a cat can shred it, a cat will shred it. One of my cats once got into a multi-pack of loo roll and pretty much redecorated the house. Some types are just inherently destructive…

The Eternal Champion by Michael Moorcock

I just read this, but obvious choice, and the sort of dumb shit a cat would do tbh if we let cats lead armies.

HAS NEVER BEEN FED, NEVER – A SERIES YOU CAN’T GET ENOUGH OF

Whether it’s the incessant yammering whenever in the kitchen, the attempts to trip you up and get their food quicker, or the naked theft from your plate, many cats give the impression of having never been fed before. But hey, we all know what it’s like to be insatiable, right…

Stariel series by AJ Lancaster

So I spent the whole entire last week reading this series, it’s the most I’ve binged in at least 5 years. I WANT MORE. It’s fun, it’s sweet, engaging, clever and a quick read.

BE SO CUTE YOU FORGIVE THEM ANYWAY – A BOOK WITH A WICKED MC YOU LIKE

This set of tags might make you think I hate cats, but I love my little hyperactive gremlins like few other beings. There’s many reasons for it, but one is they’re so bloody cute. Some characters definitely have that energy too…

We Ride the Storm by Devin Madson

I’ve largely fallen out of love with assasin characters, the one massive exception is Cassandra, the whoresassin. For one thing, someone finally gets what a practical job combo that makes, for fiction. And for another she’s got a great personality and a very intersting secret.

I know my headings look overly dramatic in this post, but I feel like that fits, like my cat howling at midnight because … I’ll let know you when she explains it to me.